The Real Problem With Porn, Food Addiction, and Video Games

The modern male vices are likely the most dangerous in history. It is far too easy for boys who lack self-belief and discipline to numb themselves instead of working to improve their lives. Not only does this harm their future, but it can also foster antisocial behavior—even if they don’t fully understand why.

When a boy falls into these traps, he becomes a slave to desire and pleasure. Everything that satisfies his cravings is instantly available. He never hears “no,” and so begins to internalize the idea that the world exists to serve him. Even if this belief seems ridiculous to him logically, his body physically embodies it. He starts to act selfishly, with little regard for the choices or comfort of others. He may not consciously wish to make people uncomfortable, but he cannot understand why the universe suddenly tells him “no” when it never has before.

He will then face endless rejection and failure. He will ask insistently but never receive. He will ruin the days of those around him because he believes there is nothing wrong with his wants. He will end up a boy forever.

If we want a healthy society, we must teach boys and men not to be chained to desire. They must learn that contentment without reliance on externals is their natural state. This is not to say that we should not desire at all, but rather that we should not be unhappy if we do not get what we want.

Then comes discipline. If people can choose to deny themselves easy pleasures and instead devote their time to self-improvement, then these vices lose all their power. A person who is happy and working on himself is one that will be desired by others. Therefore, I beseech you who are reading this: when you have children, teach them first to be happy, second to be disciplined, and to seek only those pleasures the universe is free to deny them.